In my last post I touched on sex and waiting until you're in a serious relationship to have it....& I had a friend ask me a question in regards to the post. She wanted to know that when put in that situation when things start to get all hot and steamy whats my reason?
My reaction was what do you mean whats my reason? You need to have a reason as to why you don't want to give your body to someone you're not sure about? It got to me because I feel like we as women feel the need to explain ourselves about something that doesn't really need explaining.
Let me explain.
Its one thing to be honest with your partner and let them know whats going on, but what I am referring to is that guy you've been hooking up with for a few weeks, that really hasn't even acknowledged what you are to him. That guy. We have all been 'with' that guy. I put 'with' in quotes because you and I both know you're not sure if you're officially with him or if you're just a hookup. Its that guy who always plays the 'why not' card. Who just assumes that after a few fun drunken hookups you're going to go all the way with him....& what I am trying to say is you don't have to explain and feel bad for what you're feeling.
Think about it girls, its like we feel bad for not being ready. Its like we're scared that they're going to get mad and leave us.......re-read what I just said - "we're scared that they're going to get mad and leave us"....does that really sound like the person we should be sleeping with? If a guy that you're interested in, that you have been hooking up with doesn't understand why you're not ready to sleep with him , he is not the guy you should be with. If he truly did want to be with you, he would be willing to wait because he knows that
YOU ARE WORTH THE WAIT.
You know I use to think guys like that didn't exist anymore. Guys that respected girls and weren't just after getting laid. When my mom would preach to me about it, I would roll my eyes and tell her that if those guys did exist they weren't living around me. I think I used to use that as an excuse as to why I would give it away so easily. Tell myself that everybody's doing it. Im never going to find and keep someone if I don't.
Stupid. So stupid. Because that wasn't true. It isn't true.
Those guys do exist we just have to wait to find them. We have to stop settling for what we have and wait until we get the real thing. I stopped believing in love after my huge breakup a year ago. I stopped believing in the real thing....but I realized if I truly wanted the real thing I had to work for it. And that meant having respect for myself and realizing that I am worth the wait.
We're all worth the wait.