During my blog birthday celebration i asked what you wanted to see more of - you said more of #TheMessyProject - CHECK & more about ME. 

So as some of you already know I don't take any shit. I have very thick skin & I stand up for what I believe in. I don't follow the crowd & I am proud of it. But I wasn't always that way.

I believe there is always something in your life that happens that is a turning point.....from that point on everything will be different.

So let's start at the beginning -- here is how the Kelly that is now, came to be......

Middle school is where it all begins.

It is the start of new friends, classes for each subject, locker rooms, school dances, makeup, first kisses and alcohol. However, I was not let in on the popularity of alcohol when I started middle school for the first time. 

I had just moved to a new town and was about to start the sixth grade at a public school. Public school was not something I was used to since I was coming from a Catholic school. I was very upset to leave all my friends behind but also very excited to start a new school where free dress was everyday.

Little did I know what lied ahead of my first year. I was definitely not prepared for what was going to happen once I started attending my new school. 

After about a few weeks of school I was starting to get the hang of things. I had made a few friends, but I was still pretty new to everyone else. One day at lunch, a couple girls who I had become friends with and I went to the bathroom to touch up on our makeup and basically gossip. 

While in the bathroom laughing with my friends I started to hear very loud sounds coming from the large bathroom stall. I looked at my two friends Sarah and Danielle and they heard it too. There was loud laughing and banging coming from the stall. It was obvious to us there was more than one girl in the stall and that something bad was going on.

The warning bell rang signaling ten minutes left of lunch. We were just finishing up in the bathroom when the loud stall door flew open and three girls, who were in the grade above us, walked out of the stall. All three girls were dressed in very low cut tops and baggy pants. They had a lot of black eye liner on making it impossible to even see their eyes. They were all laughing and holding on to each other because they did not want to fall over. They seemed suspicious, so after they left the bathroom Sarah, Danielle and I walked into that large stall and in the toilet were flasks of vodka. 

I was shocked that seventh graders were already drinking and none the less during school. It was something I was not use too and was taught was very bad. Being the nice little Catholic school girl that I was, I suggested we go to the principles office and let her know what was happening on school grounds. 

Sarah and Danielle agreed and we headed arm and arm to the principal’s office. When we got to the principals office we each started explaining what we saw in the girls’ bathroom. Unfortunately, since the girls were in a grade above us we did not know their names or any information about them and the only information we could give was what they looked like. Then we gave the principal our names and she told us she would let us know if she needed any more information from us. The principal thanked us for bringing this incident to her attention and we were sent back to our classes’. 

While sitting in my class daydreaming, the class phone rang and I knew it had something to do with the incident at lunch. After my teacher hung up the phone she announced in front of the whole class that I needed to go see the principal. 

I knew exactly what it was concerning. 

As I walked into the principals office I noticed my two other friends were not there. The principal informed me she wanted to speak with us separately. The principal explained to me that she and a few other faculty members put together a list of who they thought these three drunken girls might be. She then asked me to look at each picture and pick out which ones I suspected. Once I saw the pictures given to me it was easy to point out exactly who was drinking in the bathroom. 

After I pointed them all out I was sent back to class. The principal then took action right away and called the girls out of class. Later, I found out that my other two friends were not called in, but I did not think to far in to it.  

As I was walking back to my class I passed one of the girls who I had just pointed out to the principal. She gave me a stern look as I walked by but I did not think much of it because I assumed they would protect my name.

By the next day of school everyone knew, and when I say everyone I literally mean the entire school. 

Here's the best part though; my name was the only one that got out as the girl who told on these girls. Figures right?

Since I was new to the school I did not know these three girls who got suspended were popular and pretty much favored by everyone.

When I arrived at school that next day it was very clear that I was hated and now known as a tattletale. Even worse my two other friends acted like they had no idea what had happened, who I was and they never came clean to anyone that they also “tattled”.

At first I was ok, I figured that it would blow over by lunch and something more interesting would have happened, but I was wrong.

so wrong.

I was the talk of everyone.

To make matters worse a lot of people started ganging up & bullying me.

I was called names during lunch and received threat letters in my backpack that said I would be beaten up for this and to make sure I keep all my doors and windows locked because they were coming after me. I was all alone and I was scared.

I called my mom right away and I left school early because I could not handle all the threats and name calling. When my mom heard what was going on she was outraged. She was livid that the principal did nothing to protect my name or who I was. She called the principal and yelled at her for a good five minute - the principal could not get a word in. Even after the arguing with my principal there was nothing she could do to help me, except the suggestion that I eat lunch in my teacher’s classroom to avoid what was happening to me. Gee thanks. 

That night we received various prank calls from students threatening me and scaring me. I was petrified to go to school. I was just this short, very skinny, quiet, Catholic girl. I did not want any trouble. However, my mom on the other hand was this tough Italian woman who took stuff from no one.

Being the amazing woman that she is when my mom came to pick me up from school the next day she knew who the girls were & once she spotted one of them she got out of her car, went up to the girl and told her to stay away from me. It might not sound like that much but if you know my mom & her Italian background you would know she's a very scary woman.....still to this day do not mess with my mom.

However, my mom didn't scare the girl or stop the bullying.

She told me its time to get tough and not let these pathetic people scare me. Yeah, sure it was easy for her to say she was older and bigger than all of them. None the less, I went to school the next day.

I arrived at school early, sat on the bench in the quad and waited to see if anyone was going to do or say something. I was ready to be tough. However secretly I was not that tough because my dad was still sitting in his car watching me from a distance until I was safe in class.

Nothing happened that morning. 

Finally, after weeks of eating lunch in my teachers classroom and avoiding the bullying, things started to pass and people soon started to forget move on with their lives....

 I started to feel safer and was able to eat lunch outside with everyone after the die down of constant bullying. Yet, because of what happened I didn't have many friends and no one really wanted to be my friend. Thankfully, I managed to make some new friends but I was still known as the tattletale and not liked very much....

Everything stopped for awhile....but like most stories mine was only just beginning...........

I believe everything happens for a reason & in a way I am thankful that this happened. I wouldn't be the person I am today if this incident didn't happen. With every experience that happens in life you learn from them. Sometimes for the better, sometimes for the worse. But this experience not only taught me to have thick skin but GAVE me thick skin and not let people push me around. It also showed me how to stand up for what I believe is right, no matter what people say or do to me. It taught me not to follow the crowd & for that I am thankful. 

but it's only just beginning.....

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Don't forget to enter to win Knotty Ties or a Sparkle Headband HERE

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Nikki said...

I. Sorry you had to go through that but you are a very strong person and one I admire!

Anonymous said...

I was bullied a lot in school. Never really the popular kid. I finally made good friends in high school. That's how long it took me. And it deifnitely made me who I am today. I don't take crap from anyone anymore.

Unknown said...

Thank you for sharing your story with us - hopefully this will inspire others to speak up and stand up for themselves (in a non-violent manner.)


P!nky said...

Thanks for sharing your story. So sad the principal didn't protect you :(!

Unknown said...

I am so sorry to hear about all of this. It must have been really tough but it is a great inspriration to other teens. You should speak at school and share your story. I think you would help a lot of girls.


Unknown said...

Your story is sad and it breaks my heart. I can't believe the principal and those girls. Your mom is an amazing woman and so are you. I went through some bullying as well and it's awful. But you're right. What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger. YOu are an amazing person and let's hope that your story makes people think twice about bullying.

I'm doing a great giveaway on my blog. Don't forget about my link up tomorrow about styling cobalt.



Unknown said...

Your story is sad and it breaks my heart. I can't believe the principal and those girls. Your mom is an amazing woman and so are you. I went through some bullying as well and it's awful. But you're right. What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger. YOu are an amazing person and let's hope that your story makes people think twice about bullying.

I'm doing a great giveaway on my blog. Don't forget about my link up tomorrow about styling cobalt.



Nicole said...

WOW...thank you for sharing such a personal story. I know how much it hurt to go through stuff like that, but I hope you're still glad today, that you made that decision in middle school. I always stood up for what was right in school, and because of that, wasn't one of the popular or cool girls. I didn't care. I know how my parents raised me, and I'm proud of myself for always standing up for myself and others. You go girl.

Amy Green @ Sweet Home Amy said...

That is really crappy that you had to go through this. But thank you for sharing! If more people shared their stories I think more people would feel confident about doing what's right.

Thomas Mundell said...

it disgusts me that this happened years ago, yet bullying is even more prominent in schools and principels are doing NOTHING to stop it. ITs disgusting. You were brave though and made it through! and of course those three drunk trash girls got their bad karma! most likely working as janitors.

love you kel

Kndbbdjk said...

I am so sorry to hear that you were treated like that when you tried to do what you thought was right. I am a teacher and it inspires me to make sure that students are protected, and especially to do what I can to foster their sense of self direction. You are a strong person for growing through that experience.

Niki {Glossy Blonde} said...

I have goosebumps and I am in tears. I'm so sorry that you had to go through this! Kids can be so awful, Kel! I hate that they treated you that way! And that is SO crappy that only your name got out. But you did the right thing! And you're such a strong person. It's so true that the bad things that we go through make us stronger, better people in the long run.

Vanessa said...

Thank you so much for sharing this. Your story really hit me b/c like most women, I went through something similar.

I lost my best friends and was made fun of and bullied for about 2 years. Till this day I reflect back on that time and it still hurts.

It hurts really bad.

I'm "friends" with some of the girls on Facebook (ie- we chat about marriage and dole out mama advice) and sometimes have lunch when one of us is in town.

But it's so hard for me to trust people and I'm still so very insecure from that time in my life.

Anyway- sorry for the novel. Thanks again for sharing this very personal part of your life with us!

Kelly said...

This is amazing Kel, thanks for sharing!

Sparkles and Shoes

Erin said...

That's seriously ridiculous that the Principal didn't even think twice about that happening. Duh. Of course everyone would know. So glad that you are now able to take the positive out of it though!

And I never even thought about drinking in seventh grade let alone actually AT school holy jeez! I don't think I even wore bras in seventh grade...

Anonymous said...

I can't believe the principal basically ratted you out to the entire school. What was she thinking?! I'm sorry you had this happen but glad that it was a defining moment in a positive way. And I'm glad you shared it. I was never bullied in school but it's clear the effects it does and is having. Children are so incredibly mean, and for what? Sure we all want to fit in, but it should never be at the expense of someone else.

Shelley said...

What a horrible principal! I can't believe they didn't do anything to protect your anonymity. I'm so sorry! I was picked on a bit in middle school. I was always smaller than most of my peers and unfortunately wore clothes that were not "cool" or "popular". I even had a rolling backpack because I was so small and couldn't carry all of my textbooks. So embarrassing but necessary! People would spit on it, kick it so it flipped over, etc. It was horrible. BUT luckily I just let it roll of my back because I had a lot of friends in spite of those things. Even if I wasn't cool to the popular people, I was blessed with a great group of girlfriends even back then. I'm still friends with a few of them! If I didn't have them I'm sure it would have been so much harder for me.

Dara @ Not In Jersey said...

what a story. I can't believe they found out who told when you were doing the right thing. drinking in school in middle school is crazy! I was bullied in middle school but nothing like that. I feel for you.

Dinah Gacon said...

First of all, the post really made my day!!! I had a hard time in school and being able to stick up for myself. And, I also had and still have a mom that you do not mess with!! I admire you for what you did and doing what you know was right. I look forward to hearing more stories about how you came to be who you are today!!

xoxo Dinah G @ sunshinesuperglam.blogspot.com

Unknown said...

Thanks for sharing, I have a similar story and I think we share a mom who has the same "don't take shit from anyone" attitude <3


Jen said...

Thank you for sharing! Incidents like this are all too common and it makes me sad.

Vicki said...

This breaks my heart - kids (and even adults) can be so cruel. I was bullied too, seriously it sickens me. I love that in the end you are not jaded or bitter and instead turned into this strong, independent, amazing woman. :)

Holly said...

This sounds awful!!! I was picked on in middle school too. You did the right thing and I wish more teachers, parents, school administrators and even other kids would protect the students who play by the rules. It's sad that school officials allow bullying to carry on so blatantly in their schools. It makes me sick. You're right though, you are stronger for this and I sure as hell am not messing with your mom ;) My family is Italian too, p.s.

I love you and thank you for sharing your story!! xoxox

Janna Renee said...

I love the person that you are today, so I DEFINITELY wouldn't change a thing. Plus, wrong is always wrong and right is always right. When people ask me on advice of what to do, I ALWAYS tell them that doing the right thing, albeit hard, is always better than doing the wrong thing.

Ps. I love your mom and I don't even know her ;)

Mrs. Eckelmann said...

I'm so sorry about that experience, but I love your outlook about how it helped you become stronger. Thanks for sharing the story!


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